Having a loving and caring family is something none of us should ever take for granted, unfortunately most do. We take it as right, we complain about out siblings, our parents, and often take little time to truly get to know the depth of those around us. Yes, of course we love our families without questions, but do we know them? I ask you to take time today to talk to your families, have a meal together and actually listen to what everyone has to say. Remember that we are blessed to be part of a family, no matter how weird or annoying the are, they are ours and we need to treasure them!
The film takes you on a journey through the perils of the American foster care system, via the life of one boy, America. You follow America’s shattered life in a series of distorted flashbacks, left to put the pieces together, just as he does as he comes to age in residential care.
Taken from a neglectful mother, separated from his brothers, and thrown into the system only to be as lost in it as he was within his own self after years of abuse. America goes on a painful journey of self discovery, acceptance and forgiveness.
“No one ever stays… the people that are supposed to protect you don’t…”
The mind plays funny tricks on you, and the mind of one who has been abused often uses these tricks to shelter and protect you from the memories of those who betrayed your trust. America goes on a scattered journey through his past in a flash of broken images and disordered memories, taking you with him trying to put the pieces together of his broken past. Until America can piece together the past, his future looks to remain bleak, he is broken after yeears of abuse, but he is lucky he is not alone and soon he begins to bring the past to the serface, so he can heal the wounds and move on. Where he will move on to is still a mystery as America remains in the group home nearing the end of his childhood.
Thedefinition of the word Foster is too;
1. nurture child: to provide a child with care and upbringing
2. develop something: to encourage the development of something
3. keep alivefeeling or thought: to keep a feeling or thought alive
Yet, so much of this meaning is lost in the actual foster care system, as while not all children have horror stories, and many are successfully reunited with their families or other loved ones, and many do find new and loving homes…the reality is the system is weak and strained and within it much of the definition of the word ‘foster’ is lost, such as to “encourage”. Food and shelter are the main goals, and encouraging and enriching children’s lives for a prosperous future are secondary. We take for granted in life that everyone has someone who cares about them, and many of these children, while they remain safe and secure, are not loved and encouraged to achieve and thus the cycle often continues.
While America in the movie is only a symbol of many of the children who find their lives weaving through the cycle of abuse and lost in the grey shadows of bureaucracy, his story is all to similar to countless children. Children like those featured on the following site; STORIES From Homeless Former Foster Children, which contains true stories of children who have found themselves lost in the broken system. Stories like that of Taquaan Peace, who recounted as he was about to turn 20 years old, about the more than 16 years he spent in foster care, group homes and hospitals, and at the end found himself turned out at 18 after never being adopted.
“I came into DYFS when I was 2 years old. My mother, she got caught with robbery trying to take care of us. I’ve been in over 60 places; in foster homes, group homes, hospitals, it’s just been hard,… I remember some foster families to be real nice people and then I remember some of them to be evil, no other words to explain. There was some instances where it was my fault, things that I did wrong but I was young and I didn’t know better but I didn’t deserve to be beat and not fed.
I was physically abused. I was a young child being beat like a grown man. I was skinny and I was being beat like I was nothing. I told my case worker every time and they eventually took me out of the homes but there were some instances where I wanted to stay in the home so I kinda took the abuse a little bit. Some times the DYFS worker’s didn’t believe me. They thought I was making it up myself, I was lying, I was inflicting the damage upon myself. I would have bruises, I remember my nose was broken one time and basically marks all over my body,” Peace recounted.
There are more than half a million in the system and only 2 out of every 10 make it, leaving 80% to continue a life fighting against the system, fighting to survive. At 18 many children who were litterly lost in the system, those like Taquann, are once again tossed out, left to face the feeling of hopelessness in a world that all too often seems too big and uninviting. As each year there are some 20,000 who emancipate, or “age out”, of the foster care system.
The American foster-care system, is in need of nothing less than that of a major overhaul. For children continue to be given false promises of refuge from abuse and neglect in their own homes, however, without the state/county agencies being held accountable by any one central agency, foster care remains as inconsistent, abusive neglectful and dysfunctional.
There are countless children around the world who wake up every morning longing for a family, and at the same moment a childless mother and father pray for a family. Families are not defined by blood, they are defined by love, so if you are dreaming of a family of your own remember that hope is never lost and a child is out there waiting for you. Don’t forget the children around the world living their lives in orphanages, the children in the US who are shuffled around the foster care system. A family is a gift, but for some the gift does not come easy, but hope is never lost.
